Questions to Ask Before You Marry Your Partner

I am 25 years old... My mom would always rant, I don't have the right direction. WTF, in our province, if your age almost go beyond the calendar days, they would consider you as a spinster.. I looked for the definition of spinster in the Wikipedia for your reference..



a spinster (or old maid) is a woman or girl of marriageable age who has never been married. Socially, the term is usually applied only to women who are regarded as beyond the customary age for marriage, and is generally considered an insulting term, more denigrating than the term "bachelor" for males.

Indeed very insulting... I just answer them back that I am just intelligent enough and I do not want to end up in misery. I have not find yet the right person or whatever answer I could think of but it hurts.. Is it my fault if my hubby and I think that we need to check each other first if we are really meant for each other.. if he or I am already the right one.. But how would we know if they are already the right one??? Huh.... these questions might help though...

1. Is it just sexual attraction?

Sexual attraction comes from the reptilian brain and is automatic and powerful because it relates to our survival. It's not always a basis for living with someone happily. Don't let it "hijack" you. Find out what else is there.

2. Do they like to touch and be touched?

This is important to your mental and physical health.

3. Do they look at your with affection and kindness?

Most communication is nonverbal.

4. Have you used your thinking brain?

EQ means using all 3 brains. Are you compatible in your daily habits? You'll be keeping house together. Do you have the same values and priorities?

5. Does he or she have emotional self-awareness? How are they at empathy?

One of the most predictive traits for compatibility is if you can sense the other's sadness.

6. How optimistic is this person ?

Optimism is the facilitator of all the EQ competencies. In addition, optimists live longer, enjoy better health, and accomplish more.

7. Are they intentional?

Intentionality, an EQ competency, is saying what you mean and meaning what you say. Also being accountable for the motives behind your actions. If you have commitment to the relationship, i.e., nobody's going to go away, you'll work through problems differently.

8. How resilient are they?

How do they manage adverse events and setbacks? Have they been able to grow through adversity, not just go through it?

9. How do you and your partner manage anger?

Successful couples soothe one another instead of agitating and escalating.

10. How balanced is their life?

Resilient people combine learning, work and leisure throughout their lifetime.